Today I'm all subdued and worn out, like I blew a major fuse and nothing is working at full power, for I had my 2001st nervous breakdown last night. Northcott Housing Ghetto, and city living in general, is so nerve-wracking that I have to run away for weeks and months just to get a rest. The retards next door refuse to stay in their cage, they park their butts at my front door to smoke and socialise because Cursula doesn't want cigarette smoke mixing with all the filth she's heaped up in her flat, tho I think it would fumigate all the cockroaches and rats out of the dump. Her and her moronic boyfriend are like 2 oruangatangs jabbering over 1 banana, on and on dribbling inanities thru a megaphone, not once a week, it's 24/7, it never lets up, and just when I'm stressed, ill and need rest I have to hear the bullshit coming thru my door, they're tireless for they have no other life, never had a job, no viable friends, just the cretin social club they run out front of my place.
I was trying to sleep and out spewed the jabber-jabber, "Oh Mick, do you want peanut butter on your balls like they do on TV's Neighbours?" " Nah, you stupid cow! Follow the recipe from that 'No Idea' magazine you spent our last 5 bucks on!" On and on till I rushed naked to the door and screamed and screamed, that I would come out there with a baseball bat if they didn't shut up and fuck off back to their foul enclosure.
Of course I got told to "fuck off!" which riled me more, scream,scream, curse,curse, "You need help" was their brainy response. "Yes, I need help, to get rid of you 2 arseholes from my doorstep, something like a giant can of cockroach repellent or maybe some of my thug mates to bash the shit out of you!" Doors were slammed and the whole of the Ghetto went quiet again and, given the place is full of dysfunctional types, my neighbours amazingly are the only ones making a cacophony into the night, day after day, for all the outbursts of rioting in the complex, they're the worst. And they once were friends of mine, now we hate each other. Why do we humans fight so religiously? If there were no antagonisms we would invent some. I think each of us don't care about the other, obviously, we just want what suits us and dam the rest.
The neighbour from Hell on the other side of me, Eric the Beserker, regresses to his apeman antecedents more and more. He eats out of the garbage, ripping apart the plastic bags and leaving a trail of trash to his door that blows all over. These days he shits in his pants and, when it gets too cumbersome, scoops it out and stuffs it in the garbage shute for the rest of us to discover. Again the Housing Dept bureaucrats have been brought down to see the crap oozing from the cracks between our apartments, and maybe, just maybe, they will ship him off to a nursing home after 16 years of terrorising the rest of us. I won't count on it.
But Eric's lightweight compared to Cursula, and I'm afraid one night I will totally lose it and knock her and her monkey-mate's teeth out, cops and courts regardless, just to have the pleasure of shutting their gobs for a few precious days. (I'm just hyperventillating, I wouldn't get violent, I prefer to just split the vicinity, there's enough war and horror on the planet these days, in fact I think all the destruction on TV is what's got us all extra stressed with no means of amelioration except screaming in anguish.) I need a straight-jacket to contain my wrath for my poor neighbours lead such limited lives they don't need my breakdowns to provide the excitement. Probably I will simply run away for a few weeks, down to Melbourne, fuck Sydney.